New Paradigm Relationship:

Watering His

{This is part three of a three part, mirrored series on New Paradigm Relationship}

Links for  – Part One: Seeding, Part Two: Rooting, Part Three: Watering

Becoming aware of the dance between partners in the embodiment of a new paradigm relationship opens our senses to the gifts of interbeing found within intimacy. Humility is the lens with which we see the reflections of truth, detachment give us the ears to hear, self-acceptance supports our heart to receive, and transparency gives us the voice to speak. By releasing the fears tied to inadequacy, scarcity, and heartbreak, while relaxing into our whole, natural self expression, we invite the external support of a mirroring counterpart to our current state of being. This type of intimate relationship is seeded by allowing, rooted in unconditional love, and watered through acceptance.

Asking our partner for some kind of promise, commitment, or fulfillment of a future expectation is akin to placing an external pressure to be a particular way. If they are not ready, or what is being asked of them is actually impossible to guarantee, then there will be a resistance and possibly resentment carried forward; no one likes to be forced to be who they are not. This is reflected during the stage of the relationship when boundaries are discussed and labels are established regarding the relationship’s placement onto the monogamous/polyamorous continuum. Such commitments must arise as a natural desire within the individual if they are to create a healthy, vibrant relationship. If we have a particular vision of the type of relationship we are after it is essential to communicate that desire and to find the courage to recognize when a pairing is not after the same thing.

When we let go of the need for labels and release attachments to any specific expectation for future outcomes, we are able to enter more fully into the present moment of unconditional acceptance. None of us have a guarantee that we will see any of the people we know again. We learn to trust in following our heart while also supporting others to do the same. If someone I know does not have their full heart behind what they are doing, why would I demand they continue, simply due to some promise they made in the past? I have always been of the belief that we are in relationship as long as our paths align and growth is mutual. Where does the need for a promise of forever come from? In a new paradigm relationship we learn to love our partner completely – simply because we have the opportunity now, not because they will be there tomorrow. Discontinuing our habit of expectation empties us of the unknown future and fills us with the eternal present moment.

To accept our partner, or any individual, as they are – whole and balanced – is to embody unconditional acceptance. This concept is often taken to mean that we step back and allow anyone to treat us in whatever way they choose. We worry that acceptance means we become a doormat to abuse and invite being taken advantage of. Accepting a whole person is different than accepting behaviours. If we are being abused in a relationship – whether physically, verbally, or emotionally – we can embody acceptance of our partner as an expression of their whole being, while lovingly and compassionately taking a stand and removing ourselves from the situation. In a new paradigm relationship we use the tool of acceptance to bring to present moment awareness our partner’s underlying divinity and to hold space for healing of destructive patterns.

The aspects of our Self that we often label as negative – judgement, hate, anger, frustration, jealously, etc. – arise during moments in our life because they are tied to a wound that is asking for attention to heal. When we are reflected unconditional acceptance and love in a new paradigm relationship, we can experience an increased intensity of expression of these shadow elements of our Self. This is due to the creation of a safe space for healing through the power of love and compassion and also why we so frequently hurt the ones we love the most. Our shadow desperately wants to be loved and an unconditionally accepting partner mirrors the love it requires to alchemize itself into gold.

Connecting to your partner in breath creates the safety line to carry both of you through the darkness by keeping you tethered to the light. Together in breath, two will merge into one and a third will emerge that is greater than the sum of the two. We find that our love of Self is mirrored back through the love for another in their attractive attributes of consciousness that resonate with our current state of being. As we open to the feedback that is being gifted to us at each moment, we show our readiness to embody a new paradigm relationship. The qualities of this type of relationship amplify the growth potential in our intimate relationships and extend into all of our interactions with others as we collectively step into a new era of truth.

To read about watering the new paradigm relationship from Her perspective, click here.

Keep dreaming,

Skye